Sunday, October 10, 2010

A bit more and some Autumn

  I first want to say thank you to everyone who commented or e-mailed about Little Bit and the situation with her school. I cannot tell you how much your words have meant to me and my family. If I haven't gotten back to you I'm sorry but please know I have read and appreciated your support very much.
 
  I've managed to get control of my emotions mostly, and the thing that did it was seeing a beautiful view and being able to appreciate that, reminded me that even with the crap that has happened Little Bit and I are still able to enjoy it so things will be alright.

 She will be changing schools and we are not letting the issue drop but I am going to try and not let this do more damage to our family then it already has.
    Little Bit will be seeing a social worker on Tuesday to try to discover how far things went, whether more then one of the boys touched her and what she is processing and how. This will be turned over to the community police officer attached to the school to do with as they will. I am not having her forced to go over and over things, we will try one time and from there will focus solely on helping her get over her fears and finding the best school situation possible for her.

Now some zen.









 










17 comments:

Sara said...

#8 and #9 are my faves!!

June said...

(Hugs) I'm happy to see your starting to heal. It's not easy, I know.

Pauline said...

Sometimes, doing something so that 'it won't happen to others' and seeing the situation through to the end, has detrimental consequences on your own mental well-being. (Ask me how I know! I meant to pop this on you last post).

And sometimes, it's important to see it through, but only you can decide with lil bit and your other family members who support you, whether you need to see it through amd whether the emotional price you'll pay is worth it.

Glad to see that today is a happier day, those pics are very restful!

Pokey said...

What a beautiful view of your surroundings! I'll keep praying for truth to win out, and peace for you all.

Ariane said...

I just read you last few posts and I just want to let you know that I'm praying for you and your little girl! What an awful thing to happen! Stay strong and know that if you need anything, to let me know how I could help!!! Hugs!! Ariane

Wendy said...

Beautiful on all counts. Hugs and God's blessings to you all :)

LesQuilts said...

Hi cara!
Well, in ready your last few posts, I've relived the nightmare of my oldest in the school system.
He was born 4 wks premature by cesarean section, after the OB cut his scalp cutting into me!
then, the pediatrician didn't show up for 6 hrs, then after they worked on him for 4 hrs, a nurse came to talk to me while I was in a demerol stupor to tell me they thought he might survive!
After their neglect (being a nurse, I didn't want to sue!) our son wasn't diagnosed with learning probs until he started 1st grade (he was in the school system x 2 yrs!) One teacher told me it was my fault because I didn't make him tie his shoes or practice cutting with scissors! (we had velcro shoes in those days!)
From grade 1 to end of high school, it was a constant silent battle with the school. He had a bully in the 5th grade. We spoke to the teacher, the principal, the child's parents, there were no touch policies, etc, no one was there for our son but us. After coaching our son about being the better person, ignoring teasing, etc, we finally told him if he got mad because of the bully, he could hit the other child. We also told the principal and the teacher that if they continued not to protect our son, he had our permission to hit the other child. The bullying stopped! later that summer when cleaning out a closet, I found a class picture with the kid's picture stabbed out by a pointed object, I think the pointed end of a compass set, you know the one that makes the circles.
all through primary and middle school, I was about preparing him for high school, working on basic reading, writing math skills so he could be a productive adult. The school teachers were just filling in time until he was out of school.
I went to many meetings, offered to review school work at home, asked for books to have at home, they were promised, but never came home. High school was even worse!
About a week after my father in law died, who was my son's best friend, the school said they caught him taking a $1 from the vending machines, and buying a choclate bar from the same machine! Filling vending machines and taking out the money was part of his school program to prepare him for adulthood!!!! Needless to say, I homeschooled for 3 months while working full time. Then, the school called, apologized, admitted perhaps they overreacted, and asked if we would agree to send Shane back to school, he was probably lonely athome, it would be good for him!!! Of course, they didn't say anything about the funding they would loose by not having our son in school!!!
Then, because they refused to put him in a program to ensure he got his school credits, he ultimately couldn't graduate becuase it didn't earn credits (and whose fault was that???), so it wasn't fair to the students who failed and had to repeat!!!!
I went to the Association for Community Living and they found out our school was the only school in the board district that didn't involve disabled children in graduation ceremonies by calling their name and giving them a blank piece of paper with a ribbon and letting them wear the graduation cap and gown!
If it was me in your situation, I would get the executive director of your local Association for Community Living involved, get a meeting with a lawyer, the Association and the principal/teacher, school board.
This is harassment!
There are laws against harassment!
The Association has provincial laws in place to ensure these things don't happen
part 2 to follow
lesquilts@gmail.com
Thinking of you... Leslie
lesquilts@gmail.com

LesQuilts said...

I would encourage your/the lawyer to speak some speak about how the school, school board is resp for your child's safety and welfare and they obviously weren't doing that!
Someone told me and I tell other people, the school's whole budget is there for the child. And, if you take your child out of their school, they loose alot of funding
Don't stop on this.
The school needs to be embarassed, the board needs to be threatened and the parents of the boys need to be responsible for their sons!
A letter to the editor of your community newspaper, from an "Anonymis Parent" will bring this situation out, and then when the board are forced to deal with it. Yes someone will lose their job, but they weren't doing a good job anyway.
YOu can contact me anytime if you would like....
Sharing your emotions!
Take care, Leslie
lesquilts@gmail.com

Lis said...

I love Autumn, great pictures. Moving forward is the absolute best thing for you and Little Bit, well done. You can still find out what happened and pursue it through the official channels but without further damage to yourselves. Hugs and God bless you all.

Rebecca Woods said...

Glad to hear you are feeling a little bit better. Hope everything goes well with lil bit. Thankyou so much for the pictures too. I miss those colours :-(

LJ said...

What beautiful photos. Our leaves are gone now and we're left with the brown ones that are making their way to the ground. The forrest trees are bare and will be so for what seems like a long time. But we'll quilt these months away and soon enough spring will be here again.
Sending more loving thoughts your way! Hope you're taking time to do some sewing!

Karen ~ Briarside Lane said...

Beautiful fall pictures, Cara. Our leaves have not begun to change yet.

Take good care... you and your little one.

hetty said...

Moving on.... Good for you, Cara. Enjoy the gorgeous colours this year. Hope all goes well with Little Bit and the social worker. Just focus on you and your family and the beauty of nature. When you get Little Bit into her new school, ask them to keep a daily communication book - a note book to write in each day telling you how her day went and a place where you can also write about her time at home. That way you will feel more like you are in control over the things your daughter cannot tell you. And it could also be a good starting point for her to talk about her day at school.

Rhonda said...

I agree with Pauline. Thinking of you and Little Bit, hope you enjoy the rest of your holiday weekend. Love the fall pictures

busymom said...

Wonderful to hear a little peace in your voice. Sounds like you have a good handle on the situation and are moving forward in a positive direction. Wishing you and your Little bit happy days ahead.

Anonymous said...

Ohhhhhhh Cara,

I have a child with a disability, he has made it to 28, over the 17 yrs of age they told me he would make maybe...........we had an episode of abuse in my home on a Sunday, I went to church and came back and I though I could tell that my son had been molested, by a male attendee that was here....

Needless to say their investigation was.......they asked him if he did anything to my son and he said "no"...........

my son can't talk..........

and the next day they called to ask me when did I want to schedule the same person to come into my home and work with my son........

I was shocked........I couldn't believe that they actually thought I would give them permission to come into my home again.......

We are their advocates and we have to stand up to them.......

I am so sorry you and family has to go through this.......may you find out what happened and punishment follows>>>>>

Karla in Louisiana

Megan said...

First off I want to say how sorry I am for your Little Bit to have to go through this. Situations like this have affected so many of us and I hope she will overcome it. Sounds like she has a wonderful family to support her-very important.

Now--on to your zen. Enjoyed your pictures. Very different from the Fall pictures I have on my blog. From one end of the continent to the other. Enjoy your Fall--I'm enjoying mine.