Saturday, December 7, 2013

And I'm posting

  I've written hundreds of post since I last posted, at least in my head, but none have made me feel ok coming back.

 A lot has happened in the last 2 years, and for the very large majority it has been not great to plain terrible and painful.

I'm not ready to share all that much as I'm simply not mentally up to rehashing it thoroughly enough that I feel I would have to do to fully explain and give context. I don't know if I will.
But I do know I want to move away from a way of dealing that is essentially a paralyzing anxiety reaction, constantly like a deer caught in headlights.

I've also had a massive amount of health upheavals, including the most recent, I've had 4 Dr/hospital diagnosed since I was 18, TIA (aka mini stroke), or something else that healed enough to hide on scans, since it took me 2 weeks of thinking I one of the worst migraines ever from the flight home from Houston in October.
 Again I don't really want to share too many details because honestly it makes me feel like I'm whining or complaining and I've spent too much of my life being shamed for my craptacular health that I cannot help but wanting to hold things closer.

 It is very hard to write a quilt blog when things have coincided to keep me either unable financially, physically, emotionally or time-wise to sew. My short term memory and any sense of time is gone.

 I've got back into the sewing room in the last few weeks and I hope it keeps up.

One of the big things I'm doing is only working on things I like/want to. I need to get back to where quilting is my therapy, not my stress.

 I have been doing Talkin Tuesdays, my quilting chat, over on twitter still and I've even added a second chat, #talknt2, on Wednesdays at 3pm ET (8pmGMT) for those who can't make the original Tuesday chat (#talknt) at 9pmET.
I love these chats and the connection to other quilters. We chat fabric, technique, really anything related to sewing/quilting, and have a lot of fun. Many people have met good friends through the chat and I really couldn't be prouder of that fact.
Join in if you haven't yet one time. It really is a great connection.


Regena said...

welcome back!
and it's okay to whine once, twice if ya want to...then find your happy place and keep reaching for it!

Kristy said...

Welcome back in whatever form it takes. I'm happy to hear that you are getting your groove back and feeling better.

We will be here for whenever you have something to get off of your chest.

Kris said...

All good. I think we need to hear about reality to keep us all sane. You're not alone, there are lots of us dealing with hard things. If only we could admit it on our blogs! (I just tend to disappear. It's hard to tell it how it is. It makes me feel like a failure to admit in public that my life is not all that when everyone else's life seems so perfect ;) It helps to hear others struggles)

Tricia said...

I am glad that you are back! You have created some of the most beautiful quilts and put something really good and lovely out into the world. Life sucks (for some of us, most of the time...but you are still standing. You make the world a better, and more inspiring, place through the work that you do.
Wishing you only happy thoughts.